17 December 2015

Reborn

"In three words, I can sum up everything I've learned about life:
it goes on." - Robert Frost


Hello everybody :) Yes, I've decided to blog. My boyfriend has been asking me from time to time to blog again. I just cannot find the time to. I've been really busy with classes and work, and now that I'm on summer break, I've been working so much more. I had yesterday and today off, so I'm here to write and blab about stuffs that nobody except my boyfriend who will give a real crap or two about all this lol. Lub u bibi.

Honestly, life has been really good lately. I'm doing really well in uni (don't take this as if I'm bragging, I'm not. I'm just really thankful). I'm doing really well at work too (again, don't take this as if I'm bragging, I'M NOT. It's just that it's my first job, everything is going so well and I can't believe it's great). Everything seems so great for me. I've made good friends here, I'm finally used to everything here in Canberra. I don't miss Malaysia as much, or actually, I don't miss it anymore, except my aunts and friends back there. Okay, maybe the food, shopping and nightlife too. K, maybe I still do miss Malaysia a lil' bit. But I don't have that "feeling" of wanting to go back anymore. 

Crazy right? Gone are those days feeling like shit, not wanting to wake up from this nightmare of doing nothing, knowing no one, having nobody to talk to, missing home, missing him. Gone are those days of not wanting to eat, not wanting to go out, feeling all depressed and shit. I'm finally happy. I'm actually really happy with what I have right now. Yeah, maybe there are still days I feel like crying my eyeballs out, but it isn't because of my shitty life here. Not anymore. I am happy. I finally got my life all sorted out. I feel great, mentally and emotionally stronger, more confident. Everything is just falling into place. I am so thankful and grateful. Hopefully, things will get better.

You have no idea how difficult it was to get out of the darkness. It was hell for me. My days felt longer than it usually would. All I wanted to do was to lie in bed and wish I'd never get up. I always felt like giving up. Everything always seemed so dark for me. It was so hard to see past all the darkness I was in. Up until recently. You have no idea... how good it feels to be able to see the light, to feel happiness and joy again :).