26 March 2014

Hello, Australia

"Maybe the hardest thing about moving was being in a place where no one but your own family had 
any memory of you. It was like putting yourself back together in little pieces." - Naomi Shibab Nye


It's too quiet, too peaceful for me. And I've been feeling so so so lonely. Everything is slow-moving, sometimes really depressing. It has been really hot, the weather. Then somewhere in between those days, you have a really cold, windy weather or an all-day-long of soft rain. Well basically, weather here is messed up. It can't make up it's mind whether it wants to be summer or winter, but it actually is autumn. So OK, cool! Just do whatever the hell you want, stupid weather.

Besides having trouble getting used to the weather, I've been feeling a little bit off lately: depressed, sad, sometimes a lil' bit happy. I've been having weird, mixed feelings. It's all clumped together, bashing through, making me all sad and confused. I mean, one day, I can be really happy and excited about everything. Then there will be a day or two that I just feel like lying in bed and cry. I just really miss home, you know? I miss my friends, I miss my life back there, I miss all the noise. I miss the city life. But sometimes I'm happy. I'm happy that I get to be with my family once again. After almost two years, it actually feels like 'I'm finally home again'. And now with the dog in the picture, I could not be any happier.

I guess I just need time. I need to let it go, start afresh. I really should just let it go. I know I didn't ask for all of this, but if it was given to me, just like that.. I should be thankful. I guess I should start picking myself up: get a casual job, get into university, then get a real job; a job I will love (and hopefully or maybe start a family of my own right here :). I hope lah.

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